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It is hard to understand how a student's world can be completely reshaped as the result of a single incident, where with the burst of a gunshot, a person's strongest worry can change from wondering what they are going to wear to class to how they are going to make it out alive.

Tragedies like the ones that occurred at Virginia Tech always have a profound and lingering affect on people and students across the nation, with one exception: there has never been a tragedy quite like the shooting at Virginia Tech. That notion is the most troubling for many.

One of the most devastating aspects of the situation that occurred is the broad scope. A college campus of the magnitude of Virginia Tech is completely different. This event hit hard for thousands across the country. People from New York to Florida to California were all calling their friends or family members frantically, trying to hear from them that they were ok. Unfortunately, for the friends and family of 33 people, they would never receive that call.

The question plaguing many students in the aftermath is, "How do you learn to cope with something like this?"

Schools across the country each tried to provide comfort by holding candle light vigils, prayer memorials, and various other comforting services.

The most unusual venue for healing and coping came in the form of a medium that the 20 something generation is quite used to: the Internet. The popular Internet social community known as Facebook, started as a forum strictly for college students. Within hours of the tragedy, students started a group called "I'm ok at Virginia Tech," allowing friends and family from across the country to look through the group and look for the name of their friend or loved one. Without this, people would have been left wondering for the entire day if someone they knew was still alive.

Following this, groups such as "Setters for Virginia Tech" began to rise up at schools across the nation. There was also a popular picture of the Virginia Tech logo superimposed over a black ribbon donned by most students at Virginia Tech and many across the country. There was also a variation of this picture, which had praying hands instead of a black ribbon.

Shortly after, the Hokies themselves started to form groups in honor of their fallen friends and classmates, and these groups grew by the thousands virtually overnight.

The fact that Facebook has already been the most popular way for college students to connect, allowed for a unique chance for people from across the country to pull together through the tragedy.

According to the American Psychological Association the number one way to cope with the horror of the Virginia Tech tragedy is to, "Talk about it - ask for support from people who care about you and who will listen to your concerns. Receiving support and care can be comforting and reassuring... It often helps to speak with others who have shared your experience so you do not feel so different or alone."

This is where Facebook has been extraordinarily therapeutic. It has allowed students to express and broadcast their feelings and concerns on "the walls" of groups that are seen by people around the country. These people then receive thousands of responses confirming the feeling that they are not alone, and that everyone is in this together.

Facebook isn't alone in offering consolation online. Several local charities and places of worship have also reached out to students and families effected. One such local example is Family Church of East Fishkill who has put a tribute on their website at familychurchef.org. This tribute reads, "Family church would like to ask its members and Christians around the country to pray for the families of the students involved in the shootings at Virginia Tech. We would just like to take a moment to tell them that God loves them, and that he will help them through this hard time." They have also offered free counseling for anyone who needs it.

Churches across the country, like Family Church, have also come out against the hate message that is being spread by the terrorist hate group that goes by the self ordained title of Westboro Baptist Church.

A Richmond, VA resident identified as Kathryn talked about receiving this kind of support and said, "I can only tell you that I am inspired by the outpouring of prayers and thoughts from all over the world. The messages of hope from other colleges around the country and the support of the entire world is enough for me to know that this is a great place with wonderful people. That, above all, is aiding the healing process."

The APA also recommends that students try to find balance after facing days of being thrown violently off balance, "When a tragedy occurs, it's easy to become overwhelmed and have a negative or pessimistic outlook. Balance that viewpoint by reminding yourself of people and events which are meaningful and comforting, even encouraging. Striving for balance empowers you and allows for a healthier perspective on yourself and the world around you."

For people who are still hurting, it is important to look at how many good people have rallied in support of them. These people should think of the hundreds of Facebook groups and profiles donning the phrase, "We are all Hokies Today." There are still plenty of great loving people in this world, and it is important to balance that with the hurt caused by one horribly disturbed person.

With that in mind, the APA recommends that students who find themselves unable to cope should take some time to turn off the news, and stop thinking about the events, "schedule some breaks to distract yourself from thinking about the incident and focus instead on something you enjoy. Try to do something that will lift your spirits."

It is also important to try to live a healthy lifestyle, getting plenty of rest, eating well-balanced meals, not consuming too much alcohol, and exercising. This will help to keep emotions well managed and balanced by not adding any unnecessary stress to the situation. The APA says one of the worst things a student can do is resort to drugs and alcohol for comfort, as this can actually intensify the pain and cause a student to make rash decisions. The last thing anyone would want to do at this point is allow further hurt to be caused by this situation.

It is also important to remember that grieving is a process, "Give yourself time to experience your feelings and to recover," reads a report by the APA, "For some, this might involve staying at home; for others it may mean getting back to school or work. Dealing with the shock and trauma of such an event will take time. It is typical to expect many ups and downs, including "survivor guilt"-feeling bad that you escaped the tragedy while others did not."

Those removed from the incident should also not feel guilty for having intense emotions or grief. Fears are a natural response for certain people. The next time there is a situation on campus with flaring emotions and tempers, if people find themselves nervous, it is normal.

Two days after the tragedy in an introduction to sociology class taught by Dr. Gittleson at Pace University, students were given time before the lesson to discuss the tragedy. One student explained that in a class she had after the incident, a student became angry with the Professor. As the students anger escalated she said, "Some people got scared and just walked out of the classroom even though there was a test going on."

The APA claims that these reactions are normal and that students should share their concerns with an on campus counselor, which Pace provides. It is also important not to feel uncomfortable calling security if a situation seems abnormal or escalated beyond the students comfort level. It is also important for students to respect those who are hurting by refraining from making violent remarks, even within confrontations. A typical expression like, "I'll kill you if you do that," suddenly takes on a horrific meaning. Students should try to understand why avoiding this type of behavior is important.

Overall, each person has to grieve and cope in his or her own way. Even though the event is fading out of the media, it is still strong within certain student's hearts. Don't be afraid to talk to friends and family just because they seem "over it." The process is a long one, and there are those in the nation who won't stop praying and supporting for those who were affected for years to come. People should take comfort in the fact that there will always be someone thinking of them, and over time even these wounds can heal.

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